Sep
06

Alcohol stole a day

Posted by Gonnry
Just woke up with a huge headache and really bad taste in my mouth. Bad way to start Sunday morning. I think I’ll stop drinking for a while.
I got more bad news for you. It’s actually MONDAY morning and the boss is really shitty that you haven’t turned up at work yet!

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Sep
05

What fire? I’m cooking tonight!

Posted by Masterchef
Mum have we still got cooking oil at home? I want to fry the steak.
No but you could use butter instead.
How do I turn off the smoke detector??

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Sep
05

LIAR???

Posted by DON
(11:34pm) heyy wen u cuming home..look at the time….dnt tell me u are in dat bloody pub again….
(11:52pm) no darling….nthng at all…i swear to drunk dat iam not god..just cuming,got trapped in ds f***en traffic…

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Sep
04

Going out tonight?

Posted by Snake444
Where are you??
I’m not gonna tell you! You turn up and I won’t get laid again!

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Sep
03

The definition of beauty

Posted by Cousin It
Don’t you think I’m hot??  Real men like curves and something to hold on to!
Yeah.. but not around the face…

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Sep
03

You’ve got what??

Posted by Stratosss
I can’t go out this weekend, the doc says I got an inner ear injection!

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